Through the pre dawn darkness, her plaintive calls captured my attention. As I gazed out the window, she looked directly at me, calling again and again. My heart was touched by this little "distraction" to my quiet time where I was drawing life and strength from the Lord to face the day. Our routine had started out a little differently that day. Most days I'd waken, ring for Jim who would come and help me move my legs to break the spasms. Then he'd open the patio curtain, chase away the stray cat who habitually lurked by the bird feeder in hopes of a birdie breakfast and finally, pour out seed for the still slumbering avian community. I'd then spend an hour or so with the Lord, often peering out at the stillness, watching the sun slowly rise and listening to the sounds of birds as they began their day.

Now she was here. She'd made herself known a few days before. While Jim was filling feeders, she'd swooped down and "buzzed" Jim an action all of our pet birds had done when learning to come to us while still unsure if they could trust us. Her presence was strange because no other birds were around. She was obviously waiting and watching in the dark to see our light go on, see Jim come and then eat her fill before the frenzy that would occur with the multitudes who arrived at dawn. As I'd sing to the Lord, she almost seemed to know what this time was about. I could see her watching me and vocalizing, repeating the one little upturned chirp she possessed as if to join in the song.

But this particular morning, Jim had been running late and decided to feed the birds after I'd had my time with the Lord. I had just finished singing, "Open my eyes that I may see; glimpses of truth Thou hast for me. Place in my hands the wonderful key that shall unclasp and set me free. Open my ears that I may hear; voices of truth Thou sendest clear. And while the wave notes fall on my ear, everything false will disappear. Silently now I wait for Thee. Ready my God Thy will to see. Open my heart, illumine me, Spirit divine."

Suddenly, there she was tottering on the feeder on her weak little legs that always seemed to keep her slightly off balance. Oh Lord, what should I do? I need this time with you but she's so insistent. "Remember what you just sang.", He seemed to say. You mean You're answering my prayer through her? By now my eyes, ears and heart turned to her as to the Lord. Calling Jim, we discovered that yes, the cat was right there. Quickly ridding the yard of it, Jim began to set out the food while the little finch watched from a nearby branch. Coming closer, she looked right at Jim and sang a little note of thanks to him. When he left, I pondered the tiny creature as she fed, chirping at me between bites. She had come to us, called us, placed her very life in our hands in the face of her enemies, trusted us to protect, deliver and feed her in the darkness. My heart surged with awe and joy over her! But the best was yet to come through her "message".

The Holy Spirit seemed to say, "What you feel is just a small taste of how I feel towards you. Every morning you awake alone in the dark with trembling legs, fearful heart and no strength to face the day. Yet you turn to Me in the midst of your enemies, call to Me for your daily food, trust Me to give you what you need and to defend you." My heart was suddenly flooded with God's Love as the realization dawned that my coming to God was not just for me, because of all my needs, but just as much for Him. He too was waiting and watching before the dawn for His little one and not only did He want to provide sustenance and grace for the day but was, in the exchange, receiving great pleasure and joy through our relationship. God opened my eyes and ears and illumined my heart in such a special way that morning! Yes, as I answered the cry of a little finch's song, He was answering the cry of my song. You see, in my pain, I didn't feel loved and cherished only needy. I knew I desperately needed God and was slowly learning to draw on His grace and strength. But my soul was so wounded that I had no idea that I was giving Him pleasure; pleasure He wanted to return to me in a real way.

The various ways God has met me since then have been different and unexpected each day. But knowing His feelings toward me now and not just His plans for my "who knows when" future has helped me tremendously to endure. And in some way, a form of shame the enemy had been able to put on me about where I am right now has been removed. There are so many things I thought about sharing and maybe will some day but the Spirit of God kept urging me to tell you this story. I sensed He was sending this letter to you even as He sent the little finch to me so I pray that He will open your eyes, ears and illumine your hearts to what He is saying to you.

The Spirit of God is crying out in this hour for intimacy intimacy that involves complete trust which can only occur through a revelation of His Love. Some of you feel anything but loved. The trials and testings God's people are facing and will face are stronger than ever before. But many of them are designed by Him to bring us back to dependence and intimacy. The enemy wants to cut you off, make you scared, fill you with shame because of your need and the seeming powerlessness of your prayers. You may even have assurance of a good end but in the pain of "now", you have lost the sense of His Love for you.

This story is in your hands to tell you three things. Like the little bird, in the darkest hour, before the dawn before the rush of life and cares of this world choke you and keep you from Him: 1. You must call and continue to call on the Name of the Lord. If you have not been doing so, whether through fear, disappointment or neglect do so right now just as you are in your confusion or anger or whatever state you are in. Because His Name has been continually blasphemed by our enemies during our captivity, God is about to cause His people to know His Name and what it means (Is. 52: 5,6). 2. As you call on Him, you must face your enemies whether they be internal or external. This is not the time to run away and hide in busyness, self pity or entertainment. This is the only way through to victory. 3. You must learn to listen and recognize God's Voice in order to receive all He wants to give to sustain you so you can enter His rest, ceasing from your own striving. Let that intimacy be formed now. God is waiting to do a new thing, to deliver His captives, to pour out His Spirit mightily to remove our defeat and shame.

But, it is crucial that this must become a way of life in good times and bad if we are to go on with God in these last days. We've had visitations in the past. Now God is looking for a habitation. Today, if you have heard His voice as you read this, do not harden your heart through unbelief. Do not say, "It is too late for me" or "God does not hear me" or "God must not love me". He loves you. He longs over you. He wants to be EVERYTHING to you to dwell in you! Now may the Lord Himself, who sends His Word to heal us, reach down and flood you with His assurance and Love and enable you to face your enemies calmly and confidently in His Name. Recently I heard a sister say, "Don't tell God, 'I have a bad, bad problem.' Tell your bad, bad problem, 'I have a big, big God!'" I like that. May we all come to see the bigness of our God today as we take new steps towards intimacy with Him. What a privilege He has called us to! Thank you so much for for holding us up. We love you so much!